So tempted to cheat. For the first time really. I don't know if it starts with the interview lunch where you're just not able to order the massive healthy green salad you're envisioning, or if it's the allure of all the restaurants around where you can go out and charge dinner to the firm. Maybe just being in a different place where there's no fridge full of tasty local delicious veggies to steam up for dinner. I am working on getting myself out of the hotel to the supermarket so I can get the soy milk and pears that I need, and then pop by Au Bon Pain to get my planned salad wrap - of which I'm theoretically only having half, but I'm feeling weak and unsure about whether I can handle that. I'm considering alternatives, and maybe I'll just get a salad at the supermarket, if they've got that. Or maybe I'll have the salad wrap as 2 meals and skip the protein shake. Tough choices. I hate protein shakes, at least these chalky "chocolate" ones I have, but they are a road option that gives me a huge boost of low-fat protein. Unfortunately, no place around downtown seems to serve steamed tempeh (an at-home staple).
Interviews went fine, blah blah. I am so ready for this process to be over. And lunch today was annoying because there wasn't a vegetarian entree salad option so I had a sandwich. Thankfully it was a wee sandwich, but on black olive bread, which I liked more than I expected but probably had way more fat than I need, especially on a high-fat day such as today. I am cranky and a half right now! And want to eat because of it! Ugh! Maybe that walk will do me well, along with some much-needed hydration.
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Day 12: Beantown
I was pleasantly surprised this morning to find that the "health club" at my hotel is actually pretty decent, and that it was in use by quite a few people at 6:30 am. I was able to get in and get on a bike for HIIT, which was pretty great and intense. Then I hopped on a precor for 30 mins of low/med sustained state, which like usual was kind of tedious and I didn't feel like doing it, but I had my headphones and tv news without sound, and it's not like I had anything else going on. We'll see how the weight training goes tomorrow, but they had a fair amount of equipment so I think I can deal with it.
My goal for this trip is to come back weighing the same as when I left or less, and without any big regrets. I can already see and feel a bit of a change in my thighs, which are the first place I put weight back on and my general most hated body part. (I almost always wear skirts so that I don't have to see the actual outlines of my thighs.) So, I've got my food that I brought with me, though I forgot the soy milk so I have to pick some up this afternoon to make the soy protein shakes I brought. Also, as long as I'm making a supermarket run I'll probably pick up some fruit for M2, which at this point is just going to be almonds for the next couple days. And I will hopefully have a salad or something equally light at interview lunches today and tomorrow.
Free day is going to be interesting. It is optional of course, and I'm going to try not to indulge, but maybe I will angle for a birthday lunch and have that be my free meal. Next weekend is my birthday so temptation will be out of control, and my free day is going to be switched to Friday, with no holds barred: tasty birthday dinner, followed by lots of drinks, vegan birthday cake,
and you know there's a chance I'll end up at my favorite late-night munchie spot. My sister has been informed that all the rest of the time I'm sticking to the diet, and she's very fitness-conscious as well, so probably she'll support me on it and if not she knows she has to deal with her own food.
OK, time to hop in the shower and get ready for a very tiring day of interviewing, oy! I stayed up late reading abovethelaw.com, which is probably bad since all it has is bad news about everyplace and now I feel like there's no place for me to work. But I looooved the place I interviewed at yesterday, so there is a chance for me, I think.
My goal for this trip is to come back weighing the same as when I left or less, and without any big regrets. I can already see and feel a bit of a change in my thighs, which are the first place I put weight back on and my general most hated body part. (I almost always wear skirts so that I don't have to see the actual outlines of my thighs.) So, I've got my food that I brought with me, though I forgot the soy milk so I have to pick some up this afternoon to make the soy protein shakes I brought. Also, as long as I'm making a supermarket run I'll probably pick up some fruit for M2, which at this point is just going to be almonds for the next couple days. And I will hopefully have a salad or something equally light at interview lunches today and tomorrow.
Free day is going to be interesting. It is optional of course, and I'm going to try not to indulge, but maybe I will angle for a birthday lunch and have that be my free meal. Next weekend is my birthday so temptation will be out of control, and my free day is going to be switched to Friday, with no holds barred: tasty birthday dinner, followed by lots of drinks, vegan birthday cake,
and you know there's a chance I'll end up at my favorite late-night munchie spot. My sister has been informed that all the rest of the time I'm sticking to the diet, and she's very fitness-conscious as well, so probably she'll support me on it and if not she knows she has to deal with her own food.
OK, time to hop in the shower and get ready for a very tiring day of interviewing, oy! I stayed up late reading abovethelaw.com, which is probably bad since all it has is bad news about everyplace and now I feel like there's no place for me to work. But I looooved the place I interviewed at yesterday, so there is a chance for me, I think.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Day 11: ANGRY!!!
MAN. So last night, late in the night, they replaced a lot of equipment in the gym, as in all of the weightlifting stuff. Awesome right? NO! They have made this place almost entirely woman-proof. They got rid of the 3s, 8s and 12s, and got all these new weight stack machines that can't be used with the supplementary plates that increase the weight more gradually. AAAUGGGGHHHH. I was so mad. I went in to do my upper body workout this morning, and almost turned around and went home. But I didn't want to go home! I wanted to work out hard, and instead I ended up spending a lot of time moping and the rest of the time banging out half-hearted sets with the wrong weight just so I could check this day off. I was in tears by the end. Don't mess with my routine, people!
So, I went through a series of plans in my head to deal with this. And in the end of course I took the most logical and grownup course, because I am a responsible old lady. I went to the facilities manager and told him that it appeared he had removed most of the stuff that I (and other women) like to use, and that it was hard for me to do my workout now. It's kind of hard to explain when I don't know the technical terms for things, but I was like "And the machines, they have plastic, and you can't put on a plate." I was able to make him understand, and he said that they're still settling in and things would be improving. So I said "Well, just remember to think of the women." I'm such an awesome crusader for good. Actually, I just happen to have gone to a women's college, so my first experiences with lifting weights were in a weight room specifically designed for women. I was told that this was an amazing and rare thing, but I didn't realize how true that was until I got here. Even my wonderful little Bally's in Boystown, Chicago had pretty decent stuff for women.
Anyway, upper body workout is checked off and I'm letting go of my anger, trying to have some faith that when I get back in the gym on Saturday or Sunday after my trip, it will be improved. And if not, then I can go through the rest of my list of solutions, most of which involve throwing a temper tantrum and asking for my money back, then joining the $130/mo posh gym down the street. Most of my solutions to life's problems seem to lead me in that direction, but I really can't. Besides it already being $130/month, and therefore cutting into my budget for entertainment and eating and rent, it's far enough away that to actually go there regularly I'd have to buy a monthly subway pass, which adds $76 to the monthly price. Ouch. For $100 I'd just live there and stop going out to anyplace else, but $200/month sadly isn't worth it at this point, despite the awesomeness of the locker room and sauna and everything else. One day I'll have to blog about my AMAZING experience at the posh gym. School is giving out free week passes and I'm going to see if they'll let me in even though I did that last year. So fantastic.
Off to Boston tonight! No entries until probably Saturday.
So, I went through a series of plans in my head to deal with this. And in the end of course I took the most logical and grownup course, because I am a responsible old lady. I went to the facilities manager and told him that it appeared he had removed most of the stuff that I (and other women) like to use, and that it was hard for me to do my workout now. It's kind of hard to explain when I don't know the technical terms for things, but I was like "And the machines, they have plastic, and you can't put on a plate." I was able to make him understand, and he said that they're still settling in and things would be improving. So I said "Well, just remember to think of the women." I'm such an awesome crusader for good. Actually, I just happen to have gone to a women's college, so my first experiences with lifting weights were in a weight room specifically designed for women. I was told that this was an amazing and rare thing, but I didn't realize how true that was until I got here. Even my wonderful little Bally's in Boystown, Chicago had pretty decent stuff for women.
Anyway, upper body workout is checked off and I'm letting go of my anger, trying to have some faith that when I get back in the gym on Saturday or Sunday after my trip, it will be improved. And if not, then I can go through the rest of my list of solutions, most of which involve throwing a temper tantrum and asking for my money back, then joining the $130/mo posh gym down the street. Most of my solutions to life's problems seem to lead me in that direction, but I really can't. Besides it already being $130/month, and therefore cutting into my budget for entertainment and eating and rent, it's far enough away that to actually go there regularly I'd have to buy a monthly subway pass, which adds $76 to the monthly price. Ouch. For $100 I'd just live there and stop going out to anyplace else, but $200/month sadly isn't worth it at this point, despite the awesomeness of the locker room and sauna and everything else. One day I'll have to blog about my AMAZING experience at the posh gym. School is giving out free week passes and I'm going to see if they'll let me in even though I did that last year. So fantastic.
Off to Boston tonight! No entries until probably Saturday.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
UGH
Today was hard. All the challenges, they were there. In fact, they're still kind of there since I'm tempted to go out to the gay bar with some kids from school but I think I may have to be responsible and just go to bed. After watching several episodes of Boston Legal, of course. Probably I should save them for my train trip tomorrow, but I have lots of boring homework to do on the train, so that's ok.
I SPRANG out of bed this morning, without hitting snooze because I know I would've slept until noon if I hit snooze. So I got up, got dressed, weighed in (ugh!) and shlepped over to the gym, all the while feeling very sorry for myself. Especially because the weight loss is so slow. But you know, I'm going to give it at least another week before I start tweaking, aside from my bump up in the cardio department. So I went to the gym, busted out some HIIT, which was also a bit disappointing because try as I might, I couldn't get my heart rate up for the first several minutes. I think my leg muscles are just getting too tired - I lifted heavy yesterday and I'm sore, so I couldn't move my legs fast enough to get the blood pumping, until I'd been at it for like 10 minutes. So, that was lame, but in the end I did get very sweaty and the last 10 minutes were grueling. And then I did 25 mins on the elliptical and went home. The Mika cd is doing a lot for my mood, but the honeymoon phase seems to be coming to a close, and now it's just hard work.
And temptation. So, lunch was a bit difficult because I didn't know where we'd be going and somehow they didn't get the memo about me being a vegetarian, so we ended up at an Italian place where of course the only vegan thing on the menu was spaghetti marinara. Which was delicious, and fortunately it's a fancy Midtown Italian place so the portion was wee. And I ate so slowly and carefully so I wouldn't get it on my shirt, that by the time I got 3/4 of the way through it I was stuffed. I also had a little bitter greens salad that was gloriously lightly dressed. So, not that much damage, although pasta is so off limits and wasn't even that exciting. And then I went out to dinner (oy) with some chicks from my alma mater who now go to my law school, where I ordered a great big salad that had avocado but dressing was on the side and totally unnecessary due to the rich avocado that I mashed into everything. So, I don't know exactly what the damage was on that, but it was a very hearty salad and I ate a lot of it. And had a glass of wine. So, what I'm saying is, I went off plan in a kind of planned way, but it didn't feel good. I'm happy that tomorrow I have more control, but I'm also doing pretty ok at not freaking out about what's in my stomach.
The damage (today's stats):
workout: 20 mins HIIT on bike, 25 mins LISS on elliptical
M1: kashi cereal, blueberries, coffee
M2: almonds
M3: green salad, wee spaghetti marinara, more coffee
M4: pear (not so much a meal as the other half of M2)
M5: great big green salad with avocado, black beans, mango, chickpeas, glass of white wine
M6: grilled tempeh, slice of sprouted bread, teriyaki sauce
approximate, overly optimistic sum-up: ~1600 calories, 14% protein (too low!), 56% carbs, 30% fat (too high!)
Tomorrow's going to be a crazy day - upper body workout, another job interview with lunch, errands, packing, train to Boston, check into fancy hotel, get ready for onslaught of more interviews. I'm so glad I'm planning out my meals ahead of time, to the extent that's possible. I just need to get through the next few days and then next week will be more predictable. I'm on a roll, lack of weightloss notwithstanding, and I'm not letting it get away from me. I feel awesome. And fat. But the muscles underneath the fat are totally increasing in awesomeness, so one day soon progress may actually be visible to the human eye. A girl can hope, anyway!
I SPRANG out of bed this morning, without hitting snooze because I know I would've slept until noon if I hit snooze. So I got up, got dressed, weighed in (ugh!) and shlepped over to the gym, all the while feeling very sorry for myself. Especially because the weight loss is so slow. But you know, I'm going to give it at least another week before I start tweaking, aside from my bump up in the cardio department. So I went to the gym, busted out some HIIT, which was also a bit disappointing because try as I might, I couldn't get my heart rate up for the first several minutes. I think my leg muscles are just getting too tired - I lifted heavy yesterday and I'm sore, so I couldn't move my legs fast enough to get the blood pumping, until I'd been at it for like 10 minutes. So, that was lame, but in the end I did get very sweaty and the last 10 minutes were grueling. And then I did 25 mins on the elliptical and went home. The Mika cd is doing a lot for my mood, but the honeymoon phase seems to be coming to a close, and now it's just hard work.
And temptation. So, lunch was a bit difficult because I didn't know where we'd be going and somehow they didn't get the memo about me being a vegetarian, so we ended up at an Italian place where of course the only vegan thing on the menu was spaghetti marinara. Which was delicious, and fortunately it's a fancy Midtown Italian place so the portion was wee. And I ate so slowly and carefully so I wouldn't get it on my shirt, that by the time I got 3/4 of the way through it I was stuffed. I also had a little bitter greens salad that was gloriously lightly dressed. So, not that much damage, although pasta is so off limits and wasn't even that exciting. And then I went out to dinner (oy) with some chicks from my alma mater who now go to my law school, where I ordered a great big salad that had avocado but dressing was on the side and totally unnecessary due to the rich avocado that I mashed into everything. So, I don't know exactly what the damage was on that, but it was a very hearty salad and I ate a lot of it. And had a glass of wine. So, what I'm saying is, I went off plan in a kind of planned way, but it didn't feel good. I'm happy that tomorrow I have more control, but I'm also doing pretty ok at not freaking out about what's in my stomach.
The damage (today's stats):
workout: 20 mins HIIT on bike, 25 mins LISS on elliptical
M1: kashi cereal, blueberries, coffee
M2: almonds
M3: green salad, wee spaghetti marinara, more coffee
M4: pear (not so much a meal as the other half of M2)
M5: great big green salad with avocado, black beans, mango, chickpeas, glass of white wine
M6: grilled tempeh, slice of sprouted bread, teriyaki sauce
approximate, overly optimistic sum-up: ~1600 calories, 14% protein (too low!), 56% carbs, 30% fat (too high!)
Tomorrow's going to be a crazy day - upper body workout, another job interview with lunch, errands, packing, train to Boston, check into fancy hotel, get ready for onslaught of more interviews. I'm so glad I'm planning out my meals ahead of time, to the extent that's possible. I just need to get through the next few days and then next week will be more predictable. I'm on a roll, lack of weightloss notwithstanding, and I'm not letting it get away from me. I feel awesome. And fat. But the muscles underneath the fat are totally increasing in awesomeness, so one day soon progress may actually be visible to the human eye. A girl can hope, anyway!
Monday, August 27, 2007
3 posts in one day - yow!
Just a quick note to say OH MY GOD I AM SO HUNGRY!
I've been sooooo hungry all damn day, even half an hour after I eat a big, fiber-rific meal. I've got one coming up in a pretty short while, but man oh man. It's funny because I'm still not really tempted to cheat, I just feel uncomfortable and impatient for it to be mealtime. Planning meals is such a revelation. I've tried to do it in the past but the mistake I make is buying stuff that's not in the plan and then not buying everything that is in the plan, then just trying to fudge it. That doesn't work. Anyway, in a few minutes I'll start cooking up my tasty dinner of sweet potatoes, cauliflower and tempeh. I'm having that for meal 5 and then again in a few hours for meal 6. Yay!
I've been sooooo hungry all damn day, even half an hour after I eat a big, fiber-rific meal. I've got one coming up in a pretty short while, but man oh man. It's funny because I'm still not really tempted to cheat, I just feel uncomfortable and impatient for it to be mealtime. Planning meals is such a revelation. I've tried to do it in the past but the mistake I make is buying stuff that's not in the plan and then not buying everything that is in the plan, then just trying to fudge it. That doesn't work. Anyway, in a few minutes I'll start cooking up my tasty dinner of sweet potatoes, cauliflower and tempeh. I'm having that for meal 5 and then again in a few hours for meal 6. Yay!
Day 9
Kickass lower body workout, check.
25 mins on elliptical, low impact, rudely interrupted halfway thru by some girl who unplugged all the ellipticals, check.
Today I planned to "practice" getting up early and going to the gym, since the next 2 days I have job interviews in the morning and other crap to do all day so I'm planning on hitting the gym early. Needless to say, I failed at getting up and going at 6:30. I got up, but then I laid in bed and listened to NPR (aka my alarm) and had dreams about the news and got out of bed at 8:30, with great difficulty. I finally made it to the gym around 10:30, and the freshmen are still arriving, in bigger numbers today. They were even in the gym, walking around with nametags on and parents in tow, gawking at those of us who went there to work out. I couldn't help but laugh - I can't believe that it's been so long since that was me. I was such a clueless, scared kid, and I had it easy settling into a small liberal arts school in the suburbs. It wasn't far from home, literally or figuratively.
Anyway, the workout was good. I had a bad attitude about doing cardio, but 25 minutes is an amount of time I can last with a bad attitude. In my gym-going glory days I used to bust out 45 minutes on the stepmill (aka Satan Machine), then hop on the elliptical for another 25-30 minutes. And I'd crawl home afterwards and have to eat as fast as possible so I wouldn't die. In retrospect, might've been a good idea to bring a granola bar or gatorade so I could get something in my stomach less than an hour after that marathon.
25 mins on elliptical, low impact, rudely interrupted halfway thru by some girl who unplugged all the ellipticals, check.
Today I planned to "practice" getting up early and going to the gym, since the next 2 days I have job interviews in the morning and other crap to do all day so I'm planning on hitting the gym early. Needless to say, I failed at getting up and going at 6:30. I got up, but then I laid in bed and listened to NPR (aka my alarm) and had dreams about the news and got out of bed at 8:30, with great difficulty. I finally made it to the gym around 10:30, and the freshmen are still arriving, in bigger numbers today. They were even in the gym, walking around with nametags on and parents in tow, gawking at those of us who went there to work out. I couldn't help but laugh - I can't believe that it's been so long since that was me. I was such a clueless, scared kid, and I had it easy settling into a small liberal arts school in the suburbs. It wasn't far from home, literally or figuratively.
Anyway, the workout was good. I had a bad attitude about doing cardio, but 25 minutes is an amount of time I can last with a bad attitude. In my gym-going glory days I used to bust out 45 minutes on the stepmill (aka Satan Machine), then hop on the elliptical for another 25-30 minutes. And I'd crawl home afterwards and have to eat as fast as possible so I wouldn't die. In retrospect, might've been a good idea to bring a granola bar or gatorade so I could get something in my stomach less than an hour after that marathon.
Off Track?
I squeezed in a long walk last night, which had my old bones pretty tired by the end - a good sign, I think. And then I came home with my friend, and proceeded to drink a lot of wine. I replaced Meal 6 with 2.5 glasses of wine and a bit of popcorn. The calories balance out, more or less, but I felt bad about it... It doesn't help that the scale hasn't yet gotten back to the awe-inspiring point it was at on Thursday last week. I have to kind of accept that that low was just a fluctuation and stop freaking out about it. This process is kind of nerve-wracking, especially because I'm working hard at building muscle, so the weight loss might be slow because of that. I haven't been taking my body fat measurement every day, but I'll have to keep track of that and hopefully see some movement.
Plan for today - LBWO, 25-30 mins on elliptical, eating clean and no drinking and early to bed!
Plan for today - LBWO, 25-30 mins on elliptical, eating clean and no drinking and early to bed!
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